Long Distance Relationships

Long Distance Relationships

So a friend of mine asked me to write some advice about long distance relationships.I've had quiet a few but like every relationship they are all different for different people.

So let's get started.

Long distance relationships phew, a very difficult subject to even get started on.There are many pro's and con's like any relationship one added con would be the distance between the couple.The pro of these types of relationships is the test of loyalty and just getting even closer in general.Relationships are hard for anyone.Long distance isn't an exception.Personally I wouldn't do those again just because personally I can't deal with the distance and being away from someone that I want to be with.Just because it doesn't work for me doesn't mean it can't work for someone else.Look at people in the military they have to be away almost all the time and they end up missing out on things in life at home.But most of the spouses or partners that remain loyal in a relationship like that I really give them their props because they found a way to make it work for them.

Aside from those in the military what about those who aren't?

Well always hard to say.Honestly it depends on the people that are in the relationship and what the situation is.If you want to be with someone then be with them distance can only make your relationship stronger or it can tear you apart how it ends up really is up to the TWO of you not just one.Communication really is key if you are in any kind of relationship but more so in a long distance one because you aren't able to see what the other one is doing or how they are doing.

The thing about long distance relationships is that they will only work if both partners make it work Together.I can't stress this enough in order to make it work the two of you have to make it work.Long distance is a true test of loyalty and trust between the two of you and if you don't have either well honestly it wouldn't work out very much.

Types of long distance relationships I will try and cover as much as I can with these subjects and lay out the pro's and con's of each scenario as much as possible.

You Met Them Online and Have Been Talking For More Than 6 Months - A Year and beyond:

The thing about meeting people online is you never really know who they really are but don't let that discourage you if they turn out to be legit and you have met them more than just a few times and kept constant communication and you want to be in a relationship with them here is something that should be remembered.They won't always be beside you so you wont always know what they are doing and vice versa.Not to be discouraging but I will get right down to the negatives first.The thing about this situation is that the fact that you personally have no idea what they are doing 24/7 and you can't be there to ask so you have no choice but to leave faith in them.The fact is you DON'T know what they are doing or who else they are seeing and, you aren't there to see if they are telling you the truth or not.To physically see and able to tell if someone is lying straight to your face is easy the problem with long distance relationships is that if they are lying and don't want to talk about it they can easily hang up on you over the phone, log offline in the middle of an internet chat with you, or just plain not answering to anything from you at all.But don't worry not every long distance relationship is like this!Now for the light of this rather dark tunnel there are just as much positives as there are negatives to these relationships.Having a loyal partner is a hard thing to come across in this type of relationship it's hard but there are some out there.Those who manage to find it actually have real strong relationships because of the distance it makes you want the other person near you more to be with them someday.And to work hard so that one day you can be together.The types of people that come out of these types of relationships come out as fighters.Not the physical types but one's that fight for something they want in life like love.

You've Known Them Forever!But They Had to Move:

This one is usually directed towards teens because most older generations could just transfer jobs, colleges, ect. To be with that person. Now the thing about this and I am only talking about teenagers right now adults I will get back to you momentarily.Teens if "the love of your life" has gone away don't trip too hard about it.It will hurt for a while heck it may hurt for a really long time, But just because they are gone doesn't mean that their feelings or yours doesn't matter anymore.It's always hard for teens to be in this type of relationship because they are either just starting out in the dating field and found a person they can truly connect to or they have been in this relationship for a while and they know the difference between love and lust for eachother. Which makes it even harder for them.That love for anyone is hard to come by but honestly it will not come around only one time.Getting to my point teens if you want the relationship to work and you are determined to be with them after you turn 18 or graduate highschool then I say be with them.If you aren't able to handle being away then honestly you should make the decision to be friends.You can't just drop them out of your life especially if they were a good friend to you chances are you wouldn't find someone as real to you as them.I would suggest keeping them around and NOT playing the field when you are with them but can't handle it. Being friends is better than being nothing with someone you love.

Alrighty Adults it is your turn!About this situation is you have the choice on weather to follow your heart to wherever it may lead you.But at the same time you have to ask yourself Can I really see it going anywhere with him/her if we live here together?with this you REALLY do need to think and I mean think hard about this type of decision!Make sure you will be able to take care of yourself in case it didn't work out with them because let's face it not all relationships work out.You need to make sure that no matter what happens you always have a place to go or a job that you can count on.Things tend to happen good and bad but not many people really think bad things can happen just because they been together for so long well sorry it does happen and you can't always think it wont happen to you.Remember to look at reality and not just what is in your heart because chances are your heart isn't always right.

In the end with any relationship it's always going to be hard staying with someone if you want to be with them then be with them!if you don't well then don't string them along because that is just immoral and a stupid thing to do.If you are not happy in a relationship then don't be in one!it really is that simple.If you want things to work out then work together distance is just a hurdle you both need to jump over.Communicate!talk talk and more talking about anything feelings, your day, whatever!make sure that you both communicate about whatever you need to so that the relationship don't go down the drain.Another thing to remember is that love isn't something you can easily get rid of and it isn't something that is just confined to one area.Love is not easily distracted or destroyed by anything.If you really love someone then do your best to be with them even if it is over a distance.Make them happy and vice versa if you are happy and they are happy you have a good relationship.If you or they aren't happy and nothing seems to be going right well then there's something wrong there and you may end up being just friends.One last thing to remember relationships don't always last forever!